Tuesday, May 31, 2011

And nothing stays the same...

Tyler is heading off to Wyoming to work for the summer.
I am starting work at Pick n Save (again) soon.
I am trying to finish up my Insurance Licensing tests.
I will be starting online classes soon.

Each day that passes, nothing stays the same - and no matter how much you wanna fight it, life with go on with or without you. It is stressful and scary to think that there is nothing that I can do to stop that. I always fight for what I want. I try to always help others as much as I can.

I hope that no matter what happens this whole summer, I hope that it all turns out the best for everyone. I love Tyler with my whole heart, and I ask everyone to keep him in their prayers while he is away from home. Thanks, with love.

Monday, March 14, 2011


So, I am trying to be healthy. We will have to see how this goes; I am hoping well. These are the things that I am planning on doing:

- No red meat (I am not a fan, so I might as well cut it out right?)
- More protein (More nuts and yogurt)
- No soda
- Exercise (Running, every other day and light weight lifting)

If anyone else has any other good ideas, please comment them, I would love some advice on here. I know that there are some people who do a great job working out and staying healthy. I just wish that I was one of them. It is very hard for me to stay motivated and to maintain what I have worked on. Maybe tips and advice will help, I just got to ask around now...

Sunday, March 13, 2011


That nothing is new. My emotions are still the same and events for my life have not changed [much]. It is good to be home now. I am just trying to relax and be with my family. I have missed them so much over the school semester, and I am glad to be taking some time away from school.

I am so tired. Maybe I just need to go on vacation. I wish that was possible. Hopefully soon! :)

Friday, March 11, 2011

Rock and a Hard Place

I don't know how I feel about all that is happening right now. I feel like I devoted a lot of time and effort to a job position that I feel booted out of now. Worse of all, all the midterms that I thought I did so well on, turns out I didn't do that great.

I feel caught between two things that I love. I love fashion and I love the fashion industry. But I know that I need to get a good major in school above all else. I really want to get more involved in fashion right now, but I know that I need to spend the majority of my time focused on school. I do want to do well in school, but it is very hard for me to be excited about my major. I love my philosophy class, but I am feeling like business is not my place to be. With all that life has taught me, I know that majoring in a tough major in a tough school is the best way to go because it sets you up for good things in life. It is just hard for me to devote so much time to finance and accounting when all I really want to do is be a part of the fashion industry as a producer and a model.

I pray that God will show me the right way to go. I know He will. I know that everything that everything will work out for the better in the end; it is just hard for me to handle everything right now.

I feel like my life is being pushed towards the direction of fashion, which is why I started my new blog:
But it is so hard to spread the news and try to get people to support me. Plus, I never know if people really support me or not. You never know if people are really happy for you or if they believe that you are doing something wrong. You don't ever really know if they are only happy for you because they think they will get something out of it. I know that I sound very critical right now, but I am just so unsure about people's behaviors and intentions. I wish that people were more forward with what they thought. Because when they are not, it is hard for me to figure out what I should do with my life. Hopefully, I will figure it out soon.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Ups and Downs

Life is full of them. What are you to do when you are at the bottom of the lake? Are you supposed to be scared when you are at the top of the hill because you know that there is only down to go from there?

Even though I believe that we should all live our life to the fullest and do whatever that makes us happy, I can't help but ask these questions. I feel like something bad happens, something that I was praying for a lot, then a few days later, something good happens.

This about sums it up.

Tuesday, March 8, 2011

So many babies...

So many girls I know are pregnant. Pregnant and still a teenager. I am impressed with how many girls step up and take care of babies. It is great the girls and their boyfriends stay together in order to help raise their child, but it find it so irresponsible it was for them to allow themselves to get pregnant in the first place.

I could never image having a child at this young of an age. I would be so terrified and worried that keeping the baby would not be the best thing for the baby. At an age where we should be only worried about our grades in college and how to pay to go out to a movie. We should be worrying about how to love the one we have more or if the relationship should be ended.

So many people haven't gone to college. But I do believe that not everyone should go to college... Even with that, I don't believe that working instead of going to college is a great choice - especially when you add a child into the situation. I guess that I am just worried about these girls. It is a big change to everything even when you plan a child. I just hope these girls can figure everything out and make it all work.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Break from Technology

This weekend, I went back home to visit my family and planned on taking the week away from technology (mostly just use of computer and internet). Since facebook and email are my way of staying connected with this world, it was very difficult for me to do without them for four days and three nights. Lets just say that I was unsuccessful.

I feel like these past couple weeks, I was so excited for so many things. Now, I am getting all the results and the extra information is coming in, and I am less excited because many things I thought were possible may not be an option anymore.

I guess that when God closes a door, He does so because that door closing puts you on the right path. But even so, I feel like doors are closing and I have nowhere else to go. Maybe if I keep planning, pushing and praying, things will eventually work out. At least I know, no matter what happens, I always have love that follows me. I am so thankful these past few weeks and months that my friends have really been there for me. It is very hard for me to trust people and believe that they are actually trying to help me instead of hurt me. Because I have had so many horrible friends in the past, it is hard for me to open up to people. But lately, the love and support I have received from not only my friends, but my family as well has been incredible.

I know that things that I have planned are not going as I would prefer them to as of now, but I am really thankful that even during this, I have people who still love and care for me.